What a Girl Wants

Lately I’ve heard a lot of my single guy friends talk about how they can’t seem to get into a relationship. Some have even come to me asking for advice. (Why? I have no idea. I’ve only been in 2 very short relationships within my 19 years of living!) They ask me questions on what girls look for in a guy and a relationship. They want to find a godly girl. A Woman of God. So being a girl (who has also heard from the ladies side on this subject) here is some of the best advice I could come up with!

To get a godly girl you need to be a godly guy.

It’s pretty simple. We want need a spiritual leader for our relationship. That means we need a guy who is so in love with God that he will actually end up helping us grow closer to God. It’s an encouragement for women to see a guy actively pursuing a relationship with God. We need someone who will help us mature in our faith. This shows us that later in life you will also be able to lead a future family in spiritual growth. “Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong." 1 Corinthians 16:13

Take a step back. (This goes for girls too!)

Consider the reasons why you want to date. Is it to pursue a relationship with someone you think could be a potential spouse? Or are you just doing it for fun? Is God calling you to date someone? Or are you just tired of being alone? Did you know that the term “dating” is never once mentioned in the Bible? Why? Because dating didn’t even exist! If a man pursued a woman it was to marry her and have a life with her, not to just fill in time. And you know what, it’s perfectly fine if you realize you’re not ready for that yet. It’s not a bad thing! It just means that God is not done working on you yet. So take time to be young, enjoy being single, and see where He leads you!

Pursue, pursue, pursue.

I know you’ve probably heard this a million times, but the guy should be the one to pursue the girl. By being the one to make the first move and take interest you’re showing the girl that she has been set apart from the rest. She is unique and important in your eyes. It shows you care enough to get to know her. Every girl dreams of finding a man who will pursue her. I could ask any girl I know and they will tell you that they want a guy to pursue their hearts. Not the other way around. We want to know that you respect us enough to know that we’re worth pursuing because Christ first pursued us and our hearts.

Be her friend first.

A relationship should never be rushed. You both need time to grow and mature in the plans God has for you. A lot of people make the mistake of jumping into a relationship before they actually get to know the person. These same people soon realize that maybe a relationship wasn’t a good idea and hearts end up breaking. So take this time to become her friend. Get to know her. Slowly grow closer to her and learn about the dreams and plans she has for her life. Ask her where she thinks God is moving in her life. This way you can actually see if God is calling you into a relationship with her. If not, well then hey! You just made a pretty cool friend 🙂

Pray for her.

This is huge! The power of prayer is incredible because our God is a God who knows the desire of every heart. So pray for her, pray for yourself, pray for her heart, pray for yours. Pray that God gives you the wisdom and guidance to pursue this relationship if it’s His Will. Pray that she continues to grow in the Lord and that you can help lead her closer to Him. You can even pray with her! (This is a great way to be a spiritual leader.) Ask God if this is a relationship you need to start pursuing.

Be chivalrous and ask.

Being a man of God is also (in my opinion) about being a gentleman. God creatively and perfectly designed this girl from head to toe. He knows her and is within her. God holds her heart. It doesn’t belong to you and you can’t just take it. You must ask for her Father’s permission. Each girl is special, unique, and wishes to be treated that way. A woman of God will know of her identity in Christ and have standards to help support that. So be someone who exceeds those standards and treat her like a woman of God.

Be you.

Girls love a guy who is not afraid to just be themselves! I know a lot of guys who act all cool and completely different to try and impress a girl. But not every girl wants a cool, macho man. Being yourself is completely enough for us. Wanna know why? Because just like God created her unique and special, He also created you unique and special. He has built you up and made you the man you are today so that someday when He brings her into your life you’ll be ready. You’ll be strong enough to lead her and your future family closer to His promises. You’ll know how to love her the way Christ loves the church. You’ll know how to treat her the way Christ intended for her to be treated. You’ll be everything she ever wanted because that is exactly who God will shape you to be 🙂